Celebrities Hollywood And Bollywod

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Britney Spears' Vagina To Write Its Own Monologue

Britney Spears, the snot-nosed Princess of Pop, has revealed her plans to enter into the world of literary excellence by contributing to the Vagina Monologues - with a piece written by her very own vagina.

Spears, unable to write herself, has had her vagina produce the monologue independently and 'in its spare time', so that her busy schedule of court appearances and drug rehab visits is not compromised.

Indeed, the Spears' vagina is thought to be interested in developing a solo career, possibly in literature, but more probably in modelling, having been photographed many times in the past when its owner, dressed in the shortest of skirts, emerged from parked cars.

No details of the monologue are known as yet, but it's bound to be a hit.

Literist or clitorist, it seems that the future is extremely bright for Miss Spears' vagina, which is more than can be said for Britney herself.

Thursday, November 22, 2007

Heidi Klum's breast boast

The supermodel Heidi Klum can be seen playing with her breasts in the new TV commercial for the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show.

In the 30 second clip, the 34-year-old blonde - clad only in a plain black bra - fondles and jiggles her ample boobs as she sings, dances, yodels and announces "I've got great knockers!"

After explaining how her nipples stand to attention when it's cold, Heidi shouts: "You guys have no clue about boobs, and if you don't..."

Heidi then grabs her chest and makes a machine gun sound as she aims her breasts left and right, in the manner of a fembot killer robot from the 'Austin Powers' films, who could fire bullets from their breasts.

The commercial ends with v grinning as she declares: "Great knockers, I loooove it!"

The Victoria's Secret Fashion Show airs on December 4.

Heidi is not embarrassed to talk about her sexuality and womanly desires.

She recently revealed she was first attracted to husband Seal after seeing his impressive "package" in a pair of tiny, tight shorts.

Heidi confessed: "I met him in a hotel lobby in New York City and he came in from the gym and I was sitting there and I was, like, 'Wow!'

"He was wearing bicycle shorts and I pretty much saw everything. The whole package."

The couple have two sons, two-year-old Henry and Johan, who is one today (22.11.07). Heidi also has a three-year-old daughter, Leni, from a previous relationship.